I like Del. Every time i close my eyes (Lies Lies), and when i look at my blog it says for Del, i'm happy i don't know a Del. In my mind shes perfect. Shes funny, flirtatious, shes got a great smile, you know, the kind that you think is special and only for you. And shes beautiful, but what is beauty anyway, she is infinitely beautiful to me and nothing other than that matters. Of course shes smart, and she knows what she wants. She wants expensive things, and she wants a future. She wants to listen to me speak, just so she can change my mind. She seldom does but thats alright she always keeps me in check. If see were around she would have stopped me from losing that 250 at Merv's place, actually she probably wouldn't care. She'd listen to me when i want to talk about stupid things, like love and god and philosophy. She probably wouldn't laugh at all my jokes but would laugh because she appreciates that i try to make her smile. Shes like a warm fire on a cold wet lonely day.

What do you get when you fall in love?

I guess i could go on forever, but ultimately i know i don't have a place for her in my life now. Though i can afford to love someone again, I'm too damaged right now to really enjoy it. So i write this for Del, wherever she may be. The girl that is sheer delight in my eyes. She makes me feel, she makes me smile, she gives me the courage to believe that some things actually do go right. Deliriously happy. I know whats written between these lines. I just hope if i do meet a girl like that... i don't expect anything to last forever, i just hope i wont be alone in the aftermath.

Oh the tears that you weep
For the poor tortured souls
Who fall at your feet
With all their love begging bowls